standing,breathing, praying, being….


I am just hanging on by a thread.. This is my honest to goodness feeling.. Like I am constantly climbing one of those ropes in gym class with the knots, except my rope is full of slippery slimy gunk and i cannot make it past a knot or two..  I am utterly exhausted, my patience are worn thin even nonexistent..  I am preparing my family for a road trip across country… My job is at a strange point in where the ladies I work with for the past 15 years are making me cringe..  Being sober is hurty and I am feeling all the sadness and anxiety rush in… My marriage is just….. hanging on….

 

I read that back and need to remind me that I am blessed with my 3 beauties, I have a cozy home to call mine, I have the starts to a fabulous in real life sober network, I have my health…

 

For now this is enough… I am going to pray, I am going to breathe in and out and continue to repeat… I am going to plant my feet on the ground and wearily and tiredly tread on… I will just be for now, and just being me and being sober is good enough, right???

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7 thoughts on “standing,breathing, praying, being….

  1. your last line made me think of a favourite Bible verse – here it is in case it can give you some comfort too…

    “so take a fresh grip with your tired hands and strengthen your weak knees. mark out a straight path for your feet so that those who follow do not fall, but become strong.”

    keep walking dear Lex, for those little ones following you but most of all, for YOU! xxx

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